Spring, thankfully, is just around the corner and is the time of year when our hearts turn to thoughts of lurve. One of the dangers of contemplating marriage to a car fanatic though is the worry that he or she won’t turn up on the day because of a double-booked diary date at a motor racing track, previously unmentioned. You could of course get married during the week when there’s less motor racing going on but usually work commitments prevent that.
Alternatively, you could get married late in the day once the sport or car show has finished but who wants a new spouse sunburned or windblown or reeking of grease-burgers and Belgian lager? And the blokes are just as bad. Marriage: it’s an automotive issue.
The solution, obviously – and it is possible – is to get married at the track or at a vantage point on a special stage. Brilliant solution – all boxes ticked in one. The bridal march up the grassy aisle can be accompanied by the sound of track day specials, practising BTCC cars at full chat or the thump and roar of the WRC. Who, amongst previously car-crossed lovers, could ask for more on their wedding day? Mendelssohn is so last year. Oily black is the new virgin white; WD-40 the favoured lubricant.
Some entrepreneurial track owners have in the past opened the doors of impressive halls or conference areas at the heart of their circuits and have obtained the official approval to host civil partnerships and weddings. What a great idea for motor sport fans; fun and unique.
No doubt the venues can be customised to taste and the guests will have scenic views of the track and the chequered line. After the ceremony, all the guests – instead of receiving a party bag – could be taken for a ride around the track at high speed. The prospects for a special day are endless.
Why not extend the idea to garage forecourts? Who says you can’t be wed upon the dizzying heights of a workshop ramp? It’s fair to say that I don’t know anyone who has yet experienced this but it seems like just the sort of thing for a modern exchanging of rings and indeed valves. Most brides would struggle to get into a Ferrari wearing a conventional dress but who said marriage was easy?
Furthermore, it doesn’t have to stop there. Whole new vistas for honeymoons come to light. Instead of hitting the beaches, Spain boasts some brilliant driving roads and several motor racing circuits where lovers can while away many happy hours. Or perhaps, for the more daring, how about hurtling your Fiesta or Citroen Saxo over the jumps of the Ouninpohja rally stage in Finland after tucking in to a wedding breakfast of pickled herring? These are the memories you cherish forever.
More practical couples could perhaps go on car maintenance courses. After all, marriage is about teamwork – why should this not include vehicle repair or the detailing of paintwork or popping down to the shops to select a pressure washer? It’s all about sharing. Such is the stuff happy unions are made of.
As you travel the road of life together secure in the knowledge that the oil is freshly changed and there’s some hand cleanser in the boot, always remember this – the family that tinkers together stays together.